The “How Dare You Live Without Me” Attitude Never Works Out

He just couldn’t accept that it was over, that he was the “ex-fiance.” Now everything is over for this guy. Man attacked ex in KCK before being shot, killed, ex says | The Kansas City Star

So she’s at home, watching a movie with a friend, when her ex-fiance starts pounding on a glass door. He eventually breaks in through the door, and attacks her.

The friend in the home eventually shot and killed O’Donnell, an act that Bartlett said was in self-defense.

Detective Cameron Morgan with the Kansas City, Kan., Police Department said initial information in the case points to a self-defense shooting.

While the police are still investigating, it seems like pretty clear case of self-defense. Which is a human-right. Good Guys 1, Bad Guys 0.

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Justice System Epic Fail

JusticeI usually characterize the Justice System as just another .gov bureaucracy. But if you got this kind of performance from the DMV, you would be rightfully pissed off. Report: Suspect in woman’s murder was arrested, released twice for assaulting her – CBS News

He assaulted her in October. He was released because a judge denied that he be held pending trial. She obtained a restraining order. On December 4th he assaulted her again (in violation of said restraining order) and kidnapped their 4-year-old son. A judge again denied holding him, even though that incident included a weapons charge.

On Tuesday, he killed her.

Newark police on Tuesday found 28-year-old Tiffany Wilson shot and she was pronounced dead at a hospital.

Officers pursued 31-year-old Kareem Dawson of Irvington to Summit, where the chase ended when Dawson shot himself. He’s being treated at a hospital and is facing charges.

My guess is that this time, he will be held in jail pending his court date. But a world of hurt could have been avoided if the Justice System (so called) had done a more credible job.

In a statement to the press on Tuesday, Newark Mayor Ras Baraka blamed the murder on New Jersey’s controversial new bail reform laws, which mandate the use of algorithm-based risk-assessment tools. The new data-driven system is intended to eliminate bias from decisions about pre-trial release.

So a man, who has proven himself to be a threat to his children’s mother, is allowed out on bail because to incarcerate him would be biased? I would say it looks more like the system didn’t give a damn about her life.

And of course this being New Jersey, they make it impossible for the victimized to defend themselves. So the only people with the guns are the bad actors.

Relying on the system to offer protection is a fools hope in the best of circumstances. This is not the best of circumstances. It doesn’t take a genius to see that this guy was a threat to this woman. That he wasn’t going to abide by the restraining order. Anyone and everyone related to this case (including the geniuses that came with the algorithmic approach to justice) should be fired. And then they should be reminded of her death, and what they did to contribute to it every day for the rest of their lives.

Self-defense With an Edged Weapon

Use the weapon that’s available to you. Billings woman stabs ex-boyfriend attempting to break into her house | Billings, MT

This could be filed under “How dare you live without me.” That attitude never works out in the long run.

With police enroute, Gered Achuleta, 19, broke through the front door of the residence and knocked the woman, 30, to the ground in front of her four children and grandmother.

The woman, armed with a knife, stabbed Archuleta in the shoulder and back before he fled to a nearby house where homeowners called police after seeing the suspect bleeding from his wounds.

After a brief stop at a local hospital, Archuleta was taken to the Yellowstone County Detention Facility, where he was charged with several things, including what appears to be Montana’s version of a domestic violence attack.

Self-defense is a human-right. Good Guys 1, Bad Guys 0.

Why Wouldn’t the Officers Help? Because It Isn’t Their Job

This is surely the story of a tragedy. Several tragedies. COMMENTARY: A brokenhearted mom vs. a failed system

A mother wants to know why the police didn’t protect her daughter from an abuser. But she calls out the reason in the piece.

Carol thought the police were there to protect her, but little did she know that the Supreme Court made a ruling 10 years prior that allows cops to do NOTHING

Just because the police are going to do nothing, doesn’t mean you have to do nothing. Now this is New Jersey, and even with a violent stalker it is next to impossible to get a concealed carry license. (This victim died waiting for the state of NJ to say it was OK for her to exercise her rights under the 2nd Amendment.) But that is exactly what this woman’s daughter needed.

The police are not going to protect you. They are not going to walk you to your door. Not even if you have obtained a restraining order against a violent stalker. You are responsible for your own safety. If you can’t afford to hire bodyguards, then you need a different plan.

Having a gun may not have saved this woman’s daughter. There are no guarantees save for death and next winter’s snow. But complaining that the cops did nothing – when as she point out, that is exactly what the law says they can do – is counterproductive. You can wish the cops would protect you, but even if they know your abuser is near you, they may not get there in time to save you. (This mother is lamenting that a law wasn’t passed that would do exactly that.)

As I’ve referenced before, when the shit hits the fan, you are on your own, and the Graham Killhouse Rules apply. (The long version is at the link – click thru.)

  1. Nobody is coming to save you
  2. Everything is your responsibility
  3. Save who needs to be saved
  4. Kill who needs to be killed
  5. Always be working

You may not like those rules, but reality is a cold-hearted bitch. When faced with a violent asshole who won’t obey the law, and cops who are not going to act as your personal bodyguards, you are on your own.

If you need a restraining order, then you need a plan for your personal safety. I think that a firearm is part of a good plan on that score, but everyone has to make the choice for themselves. And you make a choice, even if you choose to do nothing.

How Can an Article This Long on the Problems with Restraining Orders NOT Mention Self-defense?

In a word? Bias. At least the author admits that “Orders of Protection” are not in and of themselves protection. Do Orders of Protection Actually Shield Domestic Violence Victims? | The Crime Report

There is a long litany of cases where an order of protection is violated. And also why you should get one anyway, and what you should do once you have one.

There is even mention of not relying on the system to protect you. That a court order is only one piece of the puzzle.

But I guess it would strain the Left to breaking to even CONSIDER the option of armed self-defense.

And it should be stressed that the time when someone is trying to get away from their abuser – moving out, getting orders of protection, etc. – is a very dangerous time.

Lastly, getting a protective order can sometimes make a bad situation worse by actually triggering a violent reaction by the abuser, especially if he’s surprised by the request.

Of course armed self-defense runs up against the limits the Left has succeeded on putting on that defense. (The only mention of firearms is to discuss what might happen if the abuser has one.) The time someone with a violent stalker is most at risk is when they are on a known schedule at known locations: Going to and from work. Picking up and dropping off kids at daycare and/or school. Attending religious services. But those are all the places the Left doesn’t want you to be armed for your own self-defense. (It’s for your own good!) Still, without some means of defense, the small can be at a disadvantage against a large and violent stalker/abuser.)

If you need an order of protection, then you also need a plan for your personal safety. I think one of the best ways to ensure your safety is to be armed, but it isn’t for everyone. But to not even mention the possibility is bias, pure and simple.

People Have to Be Told Again and Again. Cops Are NOT There to Protect You

JusticeNot even if you have a restraining order. Judge dismisses civil rights case against Fresno police | The Fresno Bee. Cops are there to keep the peace. Whatever that means.

Police are not liable for the killing of a domestic violence victim or for the shooting of another victim by her estranged husband in 2014, a federal judge ruled this month in dismissing a civil rights lawsuit against the Fresno Police Department.

This isn’t unexpected of course. There are numerous examples of similar decisions. I know that, and I’m not even a lawyer.

So what’s the moral of the story? If you need a court order of protection, you need a plan for personal safety. That isn’t a guarantee that you will be safe, but you can’t expect that the police – the system – is going to protect you. It won’t. It can’t. That isn’t what they are tasked with doing. That isn’t how the system works.

Having a plan for your safety isn’t a guarantee of your safety. There are no guarantees in this life save for death and next winter’s snow. But relying on calling for help, and hoping that the police will make it all better is not realistic.

Good Guys 1, Bad Guys 0

The “How dare you live without me” attitude didn’t end well for him. Apparently he couldn’t accept the “ex” part of ex-boyfriend. Man shot, killed after breaking into ex-partner’s home

She had moved on. He couldn’t. It cost him his life.

“The estranged boyfriend or husband made it to her apartment. Kind of came in through the window armed, and there was confrontation somewhere inside the apartment,” said Albuquerque Police Officer Simon Drobik.

Police say the woman and her new boyfriend were in an apartment and that the new boyfriend shot and killed the intruder in what appears to be self-defense.

He couldn’t accept that it was over. Too bad. From the appearances he meant to do them (or her) violence. I have no sympathy for this guy.

Self-defense is a human-right.